An intriguing way to try new things and meet new people…
Remember how much easier it felt to meet people back at your college or university?
Not just women you wanted to date, but also the guy friends you loved hanging out with, too?
Having a constant flow of chances to socialize certainly helps you break out of your comfort zone, have meaningful experiences, learn something new, and — of course — meet women to approach and date.
Imagine a community right in your backyard that took the best elements of college life and dropped it in your lap.
Yet, instead of 18-21 year-olds who scatter to the wind after four years, you get invited to socialize with like-minded professionals, artists, musicians, scientists, and entrepreneurs in your city.
Lots of you are probably saying, “Um, sign me up please!!” If so, take a look the world’s first “Social University”: IVY.
Nothing to do with IVY League Schools
In a nutshell, IVY is all about bringing people together.
It currently has chapters in Boston, New York City, Miami, Washington D.C., Chicago, Los Angeles, and San Francisco.
(So if you’re not in one of those cities, then the social university hasn’t made its way to you yet. Check out their current cities and the ones they’re expanding to next at ivy.com/about.)
As a member, you get access to exclusive events and activities every week, and the lifelong supply of new friendships that goes along with it.
Here are a few categories that may spark your interest:
(1) Networking events and happy hours: You can meet up with hundreds of other community members at an art gallery, rooftop venue, or even a distillery for drinks and conversation.
(2) IVY Ideas Night: A steady stream of authors, entrepreneurs, scientists, artists, and all kinds of thought leaders talk about their work and share transformative ideas. You can also participate in open discussions and meet the speakers.
(3) Active events: Ever have the urge to do yoga, circuit training, skiing, or even learn how to box with 20-30 of your friends? The team sets this all up for IVY members, so all you do is show up, ready to sweat.
(4) Shows/performances: Musicals, operas, jazz concerts, the symphony, and ballet are examples of the available performing art options. IVY even sets up exclusive access to the performers themselves.
(5) Volunteering: Whether feeding the homeless of NYC or helping a Miami family rebuild their home, you can make a positive social impact while being part of a team.
(6) Getaways: IVY hosts vacations to exciting locales like Paris, Iceland, Aspen, Mexico, and Central America. Simply book the trip, pack your bags, and go. The IVY events team will have a well-curated, exciting itinerary ready.
One great thing about IVY is the community managers.
The IVY team does a great job of introducing new members to others in the IVY community. This helps if you’re going to one of your first few events before you really know anyone yet.
Put Your Social Calendar on Autopilot
So it follows that we’re always looking for fresh, innovative ways for y’all to do that without being someone you’re not.
Here are the 3 main tips we give when clients ask us how:
- Start small by saying “yes” to little opportunities that excite you.
- Avoid the “Just do it, man!” trap (because forcing yourself is not the solution!).
- Gently expand your boundaries into new opportunities to escape monotonous routines.
You might be thinking: “Sure, I would love to break out of my comfort zone and try new things to meet women, but I’m just too busy to date.”
That’s a common thought for a lot of people, including the very same women out there you’d like to meet.
How can IVY help?
They take care of all the event-planning logistics for you so you can put our recommendations into action.
You can start small with one or two events per month to get a feel for your community, and to start meeting people.
Trying out different types of events can help you see exactly who else likes to go to them, and what it might be like to meet and approach.
There won’t be the social pressure of typical bars and clubs because the events and venues actually suit you.
Also, you and the other attendees are there because you’re interested in the topic being discussed, the cocktails being crafted, or whatever it is you’re all doing together.
It’s a warm and structured environment, which is the #1 type we recommend for introverted guys to feel comfortable and have a lot of fun in a relaxed, connected way.
Awesomely, the events keep on coming, giving you ample opportunities to try out new things now and in the future.
This means even if there’s a week (or month) where you’re too busy to socialize, that’s okay because when you’re ready, there will be a slew of IVY events to sign up for.
It’s like having an autopilot to help fill your social calendar when you’re too busy to find all the venues yourself.
How to Make the Most Out of IVY Events
Either after work or on weekends, most IVY events last a few hours.
To get the most out of your opportunities to further any exciting connections you make, we recommend showing up at the start and staying for the entire time.
For example, events with a speaker or a performance are basically divided into three parts:
There’s a “welcome reception” happy hour to socialize and have drinks, the actual event, and typically another hour in a reception afterward.
When you attend the full event, you can…
- Get comfortable in the venue.
- Catch up with friends you’ve made.
- Scope out the crowd.
If someone catches your eye but you don’t get a chance to approach her at the welcome reception, you could easily find her and talk with her after the show.
Plus, you have something ready-made to talk about: the event or venue itself. The environment is one prime conversation topic we highly recommend.
The key is to only approach a woman when it feels natural to you and she seems receptive to it. We’ve covered this topic in detail, so check out our approach articles for insights.
Even when you’re not approaching women you feel drawn to, you’re likely to make some new friends because IVY is a social network that pulls together lots of interesting people.
Increasing your overall social circle will lead to more activities outside of your normal routine, giving you even more opportunities to meet new women.
IVY Social University Review Recap
While we’re not affiliated in any way with IVY and we wrote this post on our own, we’ve heard enough client stories about it to know that we’re only scratching the surface of membership benefits.
If you’re interested, you can do a bit more research to see if you’d like to invest in IVY as part of your social and dating repertoire.
For an Introverted Alpha guy especially, here are a few things IVY could help with:
- Fill up your calendar with a variety of social events every month.
- Meet new women who share your interests.
- Increase your social circle to open up more opportunities to meet women.
If you live in or around an IVY city, you can reach out to a community manager to get the ball rolling and even attend an event as a free trial.
For further reading on feeling confident while meeting women, check out…
- Introvert Dating Mindset: Getting Your Headspace Right
- Overcoming Fear of Rejection in 3 Steps
- Free Ebook on Finding Your Uniquely Attractive Vibe
If you’d like to apply all this to your personal situation and develop in confidence not only in general but in the specific phases of dating, we can help.
Check out our 1:1 dating coaching program for introverted men who want to attract the right women for them and become the best version of themselves in the process.
You can also listen to past clients’ experience of our program in their audio reviews here.
And if you’d like to get a lay of the land with where you stand currently in your dating and attraction skills, head over to our Dating Skills Assessment.