2 Surprising Secrets About What Women Want in a Man

The truth about attracting women

When it comes to portraying what women want in a man, media and entertainment sources usually get it all backwards.

While popular advice often tells introverted men to pretend to be someone they’re not, we’ve had the opportunity to help countless men succeed with dating by taking the exact opposite approach.

Here at Introverted Alpha, we wholeheartedly believe that a woman of depth values a man of character.

Today, we’re going to cover two surprising secrets about what women want in a man.

Hint: It’s not what you think!

By the end of this post, you will understand what women truly want in a man and why those traits are so important.


Why should you learn how to attract women?

Attracting women becomes effortless when you deeply know and embrace who you are.

Confidence is an absolutely essential ingredient in attraction.

Not the bravado, performing kind of confidence, though.

We’re talking about the steadfast, humble self-assuredness that only comes from knowing, accepting, and respecting yourself.

The best way to build this type of confidence is to follow a proven, effective plan made by those who understand both the unique strengths and the specific struggles of introverted men.

That’s why we created this free 22-page ebook: to show you how embracing who you are can unlock the courage and conviction you already have inside you.

Download it here and dive in after you finish reading this post!

Now we’ll reveal the two surprising secrets about what women want in a man.


Women want men who are empathetic

According to Merriam-Webster, empathy is defined as “the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another.” 

The famous psychotherapist Alfred Adler once said,

“Empathy is seeing with the eyes of another, listening with the ears of another, and feeling with the heart of another.”

You can practice empathy by…

  • Listening in order to understand instead of listening to respond,
  • Asking someone how they are feeling out of genuine curiosity instead of mere habit,
  • Getting to know people from different backgrounds and cultures,
  • Showing concern by taking action to help others in challenging times,
  • Being attentive to others’ needs, desires, and interests, and
  • Seeking more information instead of making assumptions about people.

Empathy is the intersection of tenderness, curiosity, attentiveness, and compassion. It’s how you show people that you care about them, which is a trait many women find absolutely irresistible.


Women want men who are authentic

Rather than a “fake-it-til-you-make it” approach, we believe that the best way to attract a woman is by letting her see who you truly are!

Author Sue Fitzmaurice suggests that you can grow in authenticity by being…

  • More concerned with truth than opinions,
  • Sincere instead of pretending,
  • Free from hypocrisy (“walk your talk”),
  • In touch with who you are and being that person,
  • Unafraid of others seeing your vulnerabilities,
  • Confident to walk away from situations where you can’t be peacefully yourself,
  • Awake to your own feelings,
  • Free from obsession about others’ opinions of you, and
  • Accepting and loving toward yourself.

In Brene Brown’s book The Gifts of Imperfection, she says…

“Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It’s about the choice to show up and be real. The choice to be honest. The choice to let our true selves be seen.”

Here’s a bonus secret: Empathy and authenticity are deeply intertwined.

When you show up authentically, you naturally grow in empathy as you work through your own vulnerabilities. When you express more empathy for someone, the trust that’s built makes it feel safer to be authentic.


Final thoughts on what women want in a man

what women want in a manNow that you know what qualities women are looking for in a man, you’ll be able to spot  unhelpful advice from a mile away and focus on growing in empathy and authenticity instead!


Your Next Steps

Let’s make sure your dating and leadership skills keep improving. Here’s what to do next!

  1. For more “insider info” when it comes to the female perspective of introverted men, check out this article: Are Introverts Attractive? What Women Think.
  2. Download our free ebook, “Why PUA Doesn’t Work for Introverts & What Works Instead” and be sure to check out page 8!
  3. For personalized support in building authentic confidence, consider our Become A Benevolent Badass program.

Becoming more empathetic, authentic, and confident doesn’t mean changing who you are; it means becoming the best and truest version of yourself.

Become A Benevolent Badass provides in-depth, personal 1:1 coaching that will help you…

  • Find your inner true north and deepest sense of self,
  • Become your relaxed and playful best around others, and
  • Rise up as an intentional social leader.

Becoming a true Benevolent Badass will revolutionize the way you see yourself, empower you to connect more deeply with others, and kindle the fire inside you as you pursue your vision of what you’re looking for. Discover more and apply to speak with us today!

Micayla from IA
Micayla from IA
Micayla is resident writer here at Introverted Alpha, which is known as the premier dating coaching company for introverted men; featured by Forbes, Business Insider, Cosmo, and more. Pick up your free copy of our 22-page ebook inside the blue box just below.

Attracting An Amazing Girlfriend Starts with Finding Your Own Vibe.

Introverted Alpha Ebook

In this powerful free 22-page ebook, “Why PUA Doesn’t Work for Introverts And What Works Instead,” you will uncover… 

–> 3-step exercise to find what makes you uniquely attractive

–> Why the “pickup artist” approach will never work for introverts and what works instead

–> How to attract women naturally being your best self

"I love how personalized and caring you guys are at Introverted Alpha! It's so wholesome and refreshing." - I.L.

"I especially like how you’re a strong alternative to short-term, shallow PUA tactics." - K.K.

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Couple In Love - IA Academy - Introverted Alpha

Attracting An Amazing Girlfriend Starts With Finding Your Own Vibe.

In this powerful free 22-page ebook, "Why PUA Doesn't Work for Introverts And What Works Instead," you will uncover...


--> A 3-step exercise to find what makes you uniquely attractive
--> Why the “pickup artist” approach will never work for introverts and what works instead

--> How to attract women naturally being your best self

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