Is She Flirting With Me Or Just Being Friendly? How to Tell

Signs she wants to be more than friends

If you spend time with a woman you’re romantically interested in, you may be wondering, “Is she flirting with me or just being friendly?”

You’re likely trying everything to avoid the friend zone, from deciphering her eye contact and body language to fielding advice from your guy friends to figure out whether she is interested in you as well. 

You may have even looked up advice from a dating coach or relationship expert to help pick up on subtle flirting cues she might be showing you, like playing with her hair or touching your arm. 

If you can relate to this scenario, we know that you’re here because you’re still lacking clarity. Without clarity, determining your next move can feel challenging.

Happily, we’re here to help! Today we’re going to break down seven signs that can help you answer the question, “Is she flirting with me or just being friendly?”


The prerequisite to a romantic connection is confidence

Even the dictionary can’t quite decide what flirting is:

“to behave amorously without serious intent” … OR  “to show superficial or casual interest or liking”

So which is it? Something amorous, or something casual?

The honest answer is that it’s more of a spectrum of romantic connection from casual to serious.

If flirting is all about connection. Brené Brown said it best:

“I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.”

To enter a mental and emotional space where you can connect on that level, you absolutely have to be authentic to who you are. 

And to be authentic… you guessed it: You’re going to need a sturdy confidence.

That confidence will help you figure out if she’s flirting or just being nice to you.

On top of confidence, you’ll need even more tools to either (a) act on your feelings if she’s flirting, or (b) accept her lack of romantic feelings for you determining how to not feel uncomfortable every time you see her.

That’s exactly what this free 22-page ebook, “Why PUA Doesn’t Work for Introverts & What Works Instead”, helps you with!

Download the ebook here so that you can work on your confidence after you read this post.

Now, let’s dive in! 


7 signs that she’s flirting, not just being friendly

For those times when you’re wondering, “Is she flirting or just being friendly?”, use these seven signs to answer that question for yourself!


1. She wants you to know that she’s single.

This can be a subtle, indirect mention of her relationship status or something more obvious. So pay attention!

Bonus: If she asks whether or not you’re single, that’s a big clue she’s interested.


2. She’s asking you more thoughtful questions.

If it feels like you’ve ventured out of small talk territory, you can take a sigh of relief for two reasons!

First of all, you’re in a more comfortable area with conversations that are more your speed: thoughtful, intentional, and personal.

Secondly, a woman who wants to know about your hobbies, lifestyle, interests, and beliefs is a woman who’s very curious about who you are… likely because you’ve caught her attention.


3. Her countenance or demeanor changes when you’re around.

Compare how she interacts with others to how she relates to you. Do you get any special treatment like a bigger smile, more laughs, or more frequent compliments?

These are all ways that women show their romantic inclinations!


4. She’s very attentive when you’re talking.

If a woman is genuinely hanging on every word you say instead of simply asking you questions, this bodes well in your evaluation of her flirtatious intentions.

Her engaging presence may come with follow-up questions, genuine emotional reactions to what you say, and overall eagerness for the conversation to continue.


5. She asks for your help or opinion.

We flirt with people we’re attracted to, and it’s the people we’re attracted to that we long to be around most.

So if she seems to be looking for ways to make you feel needed, for example by asking for your help with moving, picking a TV show to watch, or deciding what to do about a family conflict, take those asks as a good sign if she wants your input.


6. She goes out of her way to talk to you.

Whether she leaves the people she’s standing with to come greet you, or her effort to connect with you beyond a simple “How’s it going?” gives her away, do your best to recognize the moment for what it is: an opportunity to form a deeper connection.

Why? She’s likely flirting with you!


7. Her body language reveals that she’s into you.

Leaning in, brushing your arm, mirroring your actions, angling her feet toward you… these behaviors all convey attraction.

If you find that a more intense level of warmth radiates from her as she chats with you, trust your instincts… she’s not just being nice!

Keep in mind that a “yes” to one of these signs alone may not reflect the truth. Instead, reflect on all of these signs in context with each other for the most clarity!


More personalized help to answer the question “Is she flirting with me or just being friendly?”

is she flirting with me or just being friendlyNow that you know how to decipher some signs of flirting, you may have some clarity and feel ready to make your next move.

To feel even more prepared, get some 1:1 help from an established expert who can help you figure out what step to take next. For that, keep reading!


Your Next Steps

First, don’t forget to download our free ebook, “Why PUA Doesn’t Work for Introverts & What Works Instead” to build these dating skills on a foundation of confidence!

For more personalized support, consider our Launch Your Dating Life program.

Your IA Coach’s 1:1 feedback and support in your life is not only about getting dating results, but about becoming the best possible version of yourself through the process.

That’s why we’ve designed this 12-week customized program to help you finally master these skills once and for all…

  • Be and feel sexually attractive,
  • Meet and connect with great women, and
  • Fill your dating funnel with quality dates.

Don’t wait! Let’s launch your dating life today.

Micayla from IA
Micayla from IA
Micayla is resident writer here at Introverted Alpha, which is known as the premier dating coaching company for introverted men; featured by Forbes, Business Insider, Cosmo, and more. Pick up your free copy of our 22-page ebook inside the blue box just below.

Attracting An Amazing Girlfriend Starts with Finding Your Own Vibe.

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In this powerful free 22-page ebook, “Why PUA Doesn’t Work for Introverts And What Works Instead,” you will uncover… 

–> 3-step exercise to find what makes you uniquely attractive

–> Why the “pickup artist” approach will never work for introverts and what works instead

–> How to attract women naturally being your best self

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Attracting An Amazing Girlfriend Starts With Finding Your Own Vibe.

In this powerful free 22-page ebook, "Why PUA Doesn't Work for Introverts And What Works Instead," you will uncover...


--> A 3-step exercise to find what makes you uniquely attractive
--> Why the “pickup artist” approach will never work for introverts and what works instead

--> How to attract women naturally being your best self

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