How to Keep Conversations Going When You’re an Introvert: 3 Effective Strategies

3 strategies to help introverts enjoy great conversations

If you’re wondering how to keep conversations going as an introvert, you certainly aren’t alone!

Socializing for introverts can sometimes feel a bit challenging.

When you recharge best by spending time alone, having long conversations with people can understandably feel exhausting, especially when you’re talking with someone you’re interested in and the stakes feel higher.

So, how can you let your personality shine through your conversational manner in a way that won’t leave you feeling depleted?

Happily, today’s post isn’t about how to make small talk. In fact, we’re going to focus on the conversation topics and social strategies that will help you move beyond the small talk!


Why does keeping a conversation alive matter in the first place?

When you can establish common ground and move past small talk, then you get to experience deeper, more fulfilling conversations that leave you in a contemplative state rather than a drained one.

Do you ever get caught in this downward spiral?

You believe you’re not good at having conversations, so you try to avoid conversations, thus missing opportunities to become a better conversationalist… and the cycle goes on.

When you focus on yourself internally and how you can grow personally, you’ll experience much better results in your conversations. As time goes on, that little voice inside your head that is telling you that you’re not good enough will get quieter and quieter, until the negative self-talk ultimately fades away.

So, how do you get there?

The key is CONFIDENCE.

We crafted this free 22-page ebook to help you better understand yourself, your strengths, and your secret superpowers that draw women to you. This knowledge is the first step to developing that unshakeable confidence you long for.

Download “Why PUA Doesn’t Work For Introverts & What Works Instead” now so you can circle back after you read this post!

Now, let’s dive into three strategies for how to keep conversations going!


How to keep conversations going: 3 effective strategies


1. Ask engaging questions

When you ask open-ended questions, and you genuinely want to know what the other person has to say, you immediately make them feel interesting, important, and worth listening to.

Who doesn’t want to feel like that?!

By making the other person feel special, you’ll receive more warmth and authenticity from them.

These are two very important ingredients in creating an atmosphere where conversation flows smoothly and effortlessly!

As they share more, look for similarities between the two of you and emphasize them. This contributes to a more meaningful bond. Plus, forming a connection with someone is the fastest way to move beyond small talk.


2. Build excitement

When people are happy to be around each other, conversation tends to feel like a walk in the park.

You can create that enthusiasm when you show that you truly care about what’s important to them. You can express your interest by sharing joy and appreciation for the ideas and hobbies they speak of. Remember, they’re only talking about something if the subject matters to them!

If their eyes light up and they smile or talk more animatedly, you know you’ve found a great topic.

Asking thoughtful questions, like we shared above, is another great way to show your curiosity and interest in their life!


3. Share stories

Developing your conversation skills isn’t only about listening and asking questions (although both aspects are very important!).

A conversation is a game of give and take. If you don’t offer anything for the other person to connect with, quite simply, they won’t feel connected to you.

As explored in The Patterns of Effective Conversation, some of the purposes of conversation are to…

  • Acquire information,
  • Make sense of a complex issue,
  • Obtain different perspectives or viewpoints,
  • Create change by challenging or shifting someone’s views or intentions,
  • Brainstorm ideas and imagine possibilities,
  • Collaborate effectively on a project or goal,
  • Deepen or create relationships,
  • Entertain or have fun, often through playful banter, witty comments, or flirting,
  • Obtain or offer recognition, attention, or reputation,
  • Receive or give appreciation, empathy, or reassurance,
  • Make decisions, or
  • Solve problems or create a plan to respond to them.

All of these examples require a connection formed through conversation.

Since our brains are naturally wired for stories, recounting an event is by far the fastest way to connect with someone AND to be remembered later!


Conclusion on how to keep conversations going
Man And Woman Talking - How To Keep Conversations Going

Now that you know these three conversation strategies, you’ll be able to play to your strengths and interests as you connect with others, whether that’s through…

  • Asking thoughtful questions to move the conversation beyond small talk,
  • Generating some enthusiasm that makes both parties eager to continue talking, or
  • Sharing stories to help you both connect on a deeply human level.

All of these pointers, and ideally a combination of them throughout a conversation, are great tips to fall back on when you’re feeling a bit worried or wondering how to keep conversations going.


Your Next Steps

To make sure your dating and leadership skills keep improving, here’s what to do next:

In Magnetic Confidence, you’ll discover how to…

  • Get noticed by quality women,
  • Replace “nice guy” patterns with genuine strength, and
  • Develop an unshakable sense of self.

When you’re able to confidently draw out your unique, genuine personality, you’ll easily create wonderful, lasting connections with others.

Start developing a magnetic confidence of your very own today.

Micayla from IA
Micayla from IA
Micayla is resident writer here at Introverted Alpha, which is known as the premier dating coaching company for introverted men; featured by Forbes, Business Insider, Cosmo, and more. Pick up your free copy of our 22-page ebook inside the blue box just below.

Attracting An Amazing Girlfriend Starts with Finding Your Own Vibe.

Introverted Alpha Ebook

In this powerful free 22-page ebook, “Why PUA Doesn’t Work for Introverts And What Works Instead,” you will uncover… 

–> 3-step exercise to find what makes you uniquely attractive

–> Why the “pickup artist” approach will never work for introverts and what works instead

–> How to attract women naturally being your best self

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Attracting An Amazing Girlfriend Starts With Finding Your Own Vibe.

In this powerful free 22-page ebook, "Why PUA Doesn't Work for Introverts And What Works Instead," you will uncover...


--> A 3-step exercise to find what makes you uniquely attractive
--> Why the “pickup artist” approach will never work for introverts and what works instead

--> How to attract women naturally being your best self

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