“How can I bring out my adventurous side?”

Let’s bring out your sense of adventure.

Scrolling through your Instagram feed, do you ever feel like you’re missing out on the fullness of life that you *could* have?

If you’re (a) a human being who (b) scrolls through Instagram, the answer is YES.

(Unless, perhaps, you’re Ellen or Jay-Z, and that’s a big ‘perhaps’ because even they might feel this way sometimes.) ;)

While many people may see this as an “evil” of technology, the truth is it’s not necessarily a bad thing…

The sense of missing out can actually afford us a very real and capitalizable opportunity we didn’t have when our exposure to possibilities was smaller (aka, before the internet!).

 

The opportunity is this:

If we can use the *pang* of missing out as INSPIRATION to go and be more of our best, then awesome!

We’ve now used the stimulus of Instagram to produce a helpful response.

It’s at this point where we realize that the alternative—wallowing or feeling helplessly stuck in a rut, wondering, “How come my life isn’t like that?”—is not the only option.

Yay, and thank goodness!

So, fellow Instagram purveyor, would you like to bring out your adventurous side more?

Let’s do it!

Here are 5 ways to beckon your adventurous side to come out and play:

 

1. Going to different places than you normally go

Trying out new places is a great way to nurture your adventurous side.

You can cross off a few places this month that you’ve been meaning to try out, or you can ask around or google around per #5 below!

Once you’ve found some places to try out, put on something you feel confident and happy in, and go on out the door to try it. :)

Here’s one IA Client’s experience with that:

I picked (1) a new, trendy tea room near my house, (2) a local farmers market, (3) a painting class, and (4) a cooking class.

The tea room was cool. There were no women there, but I felt a good vibe from one of the baristas so we talked about his artwork.

The farmers market was great. I found one girl who I really liked and we talked a little… she was working at a tent that sold gelato.

The painting class was a blast. It was small (there was one couple and a family of five), but everyone had an awesome vibe and the conversations flowed easily.

Sometimes the best adventures are not far from our doorstep, if only we pop out to new places and look around!

 

2. Brightening someone’s day

This may not have occurred to you as part of your adventurous side, but it indeed is!

When you can be in tune with other people, noticing their state of being in that moment, and doing something to bring them joy, that is both generous and impressive…

Which makes up our well-loved IA phrase: Benevolent Badass! 

Here’s an example of what one IA Client did along these lines:

This afternoon, I was buying shoes, and when I went to check out, the line got really long. There were a couple of difficult sets of customers taking a lot of time with the ladies at the register.

When I finally went to check out, I was able to cheer up the girl by cracking a couple of jokes and smiling at her.

She was clearly frustrated from the previous customer, so I was glad I could cheer her up.

Woohoo; a win!

You can do the same just by (a) paying attention to your environment and the people in it, and (b) offering a bit of joy where you can. :)

 

3. Finding opportunities to start conversations

In our Launch Your Dating Life program, our second module is about intentional quality over excessive quantity.

Reason being, as an introverted man, you have limited energy. (Well all people do, but yours is especially precious!)

So what does that mean?  It means that finding a way to be in tune with intentional quality will really benefit you when it comes to noticing opportunities to start a conversation.

For example, here’s how the first IA Client I quoted above did it, when he visited his farmers market:

When I went to the farmers market, I worked on Intentional Quality.

I walked and looked around at the vendors and waited until I felt a good vibe from someone (7 out of 10, or higher) before engaging.

As a result, I felt more inspired to talk and more energized from the outcome — it felt really good and encouraging rather than that feeling of beating yourself up because “you didn’t talk to anyone.”

I equate this to a baseball analogy: the best hitters in the world are usually extremely selective. They wait for a pitch in their exact spot and then do damage; everything else, they avoid. I felt kind of like that… just chill and relaxed and being selective.

An awesome win!

The adventure of a new connection feels more appealing this way. Feel free to start conversations on your own terms, based on what you’re sensing is in flow with the people around you.

 

4. Analyzing (and acting on) your Pinterest boards

The best adventures are going to be the ones you’re inspired by.

What is inspiring to you uniquely?

The more digging/internal asking and answering you do up front, the stronger start you have.

Then you can connect the dots. Analyze what you seem to feel drawn to, and then what is accessible for you from here as a next step.

 

A personal style-based example…

When I started inquiring more about what I personally liked in style and fashion, I made a Pinterest board of books that inspired me and that I could see myself being really happy in.

Note these were different from just things I thought were beautiful. Rather, I was always tying it back to… would *I* like to wear this, even if it’s a bit outside of my comfort zone right now?

Once I’d gathered several images, I analyzed them:

What do they have in common?

Turns out that monochromatic neutrals, either an altogether darker look with navy blues, blacks, or dark greys… or lighter and softer looks like all creams, all whites, all light greys, or a dress or long jacket in softer colors like light purple just made me so happy!

So what I did next was go to my own closet, find some things that were monochromatic like that, try them on and VOILA!

It was the same kind of feeling I had from those images.

Interestingly, I had the clothes there all along, but it wasn’t until I (a) researched what I liked for me, (b) analyzed the results and saw the takeaways, and then (c) went into my own closet and applied what I had learned, that I reaped the fruits of the self-discovery.

 

When it comes to adventure, you can do the exact same thing!

(1) First, do some journaling on what adventure means to you.

>> Does it mean more fun time with friends? What kinds of things would y’all do more of?

>> Does it mean regular or exotic travel? What kind of travel?

>> Does it mean meeting new and interesting people? What kind of people?

>> Does it mean spending your Saturdays in a certain way? What would that look like… exploring your city, building your skills in a chosen hobby, or exploring the great outdoors?

>> Does it mean picking up / brushing up on a hobby? What kind of hobby… playing the guitar, riding horses, baking desserts, distance running, learning French?

 

(2) Then research inspiration on Pinterest or elsewhere to put together a board that inspires you personally with what you feel your adventurous side might be.

 

(3) Once you have a collection of images, analyze them for patterns! Do you see lots of outdoor travel, sports, social time with friends, or music, for example? What do you see?

 

(4) Then find low-hanging fruit where you’re already *so close* to doing exactly what you find adventurous. For example, you see lots of camping images on your Pinterest board. You then remember that your buddy had invited you to go on a camping trip. Done! You’re now acting on what inspires you.

And if there’s no such invitation? Find another low-hanging fruit!

The key is that with the first thing you try from your inspirational Pinterest board is EASY from where you are today. Then once you get your feet wet, you can expand from there.

 

5. Being a tourist in your city

One of the easiest ways you can bring out your adventurous side is to hop onto google and search “what to do in [your city or town]”.

You will be greeted with a host of options right at your fingertips! From monuments, you didn’t know about, to rooftop views you’d never explored, to museum exhibits you hadn’t been privy to… there’s a whole world of options to pique your adventurous interest!

Open up the results that look interesting, and settle on one you feel inspired (even if a bit trepidatious!) to try this upcoming week/weekend.

 

From Inspiration to Celebration

If you’re an introverted man who’s excited to bring out your adventurous edge more, you’re similar to many of our clients… and they’ve had great success with the strategies above!

Doing even just one of those things has helped to expand their world, brighten their eyes, and bring along new connections they’d not have made otherwise!

In our program, we work with guys on first identifying their deepest values and most attractive qualities, and then on bringing out one or two that they want to express more of.

Many times and no surprise in the age of social media, a value our guys have and then choose to actively bring out more is *adventure*, hence the inspiration for this article.

So now after reading, you have a better idea on how to do just that! You can build in habits and key choices that shape your life towards more adventure.

As you do, you and others around you can feel and enjoy the fruits of that.

You may even make an inspirational/celebratory Instagram post or two about it to bring things full circle, although life’s sweetest and most adventurous moments can be and often are worlds away from social media. ;)

 

Want more support?

And if you’d like our support on bringing out your own adventurous side, awesome!

You can start by downloading our ebook on finding your deepest values and most attractive qualities. (Adventure, potentially included… we’ll see!)

From there, check out Launch Your Dating Life. This is our 12-week 1:1 coaching program on getting you set with a flow of new dating adventures!

Even if you don’t have any experience and/or tend to “lock up” around women, we’ve got you covered. We’ve seen it all and supported it all, as long as our clients have that willing attitude that is so characteristic of Introverted Alphas! To learn more and inquire, go to our program page here.

Sarah Jones
Sarah Jones
Sarah Jones is founder and CEO of Introverted Alpha; the premier dating coaching company for introverted men; featured by Forbes, Business Insider, Cosmo, and more. Pick up your free copy of Sarah's 22-page ebook inside the blue box just below.

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